Monday, May 12, 2014

Fly Away, Escape

Flight (2014)

I have this mad need to fly away, escape, run, forget. 

Yesterday was, for some reason, his vivid face everywhere. Naps were not quite fun because he'd be there, waiting. From the first time when that face was sparkly and adorably awkward, until the last time when it was just tired and telling me he did call and send messages everyday. And so I ached for a great part of the afternoon and the evening. Until the wee hours. Spasms of aches, like tiny little stabs that resulted to about a million sighs. 

And then I woke up this morning, countless times, my lethargy and melancholy letting me sink back into many tiresome dreams I cannot even remember. Each waking brought with it the question of what-am-I-still-doing-alive. And so I slept on, until I had to drag myself out eventually. This is just one of a few phases, but how it weighs upon me. 

An hour after noon, I was asleep again. And then I got up disoriented and anxious and having painful withdrawal symptoms, and as I passed the mirror I briefly saw that face, and remembered how he said we kind of look alike. Then I died, and decided I must keep pressing forward. 

I have this mad need to fly away, escape, run, forget. 

No comments:

Post a Comment

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...